Lekhny post -09-Dec-2021

                      RELATIONSHIPS – TODAY AND YESTERDAY.

As social animals, we all have a desire to be encircled by cherished ones. We love to be pampered, revered, and allured by someone special. Life becomes meaningful and celestial to be around beloved ones. Every generation had its own definition of the relationship. They had their privileges, importance, and commitments. Times keep changing, and so does our approach to relationships. I remember that my dad and uncles had no audacity to stand before their father and speak boisterously. They respected their father to the limit that they would not speak a word before them. Times changed when it came to our generation. I had all the liberty to speak before my dad. I even got angry with him and would throw all tantrums before him. Today's kids are freer and more liberal. They consider their parents as friends. Though there is respect, love has overshadowed the respect. They are liberal to speak their heart out.

The same attitude is shown towards the most sacred and committed relationship called love. I got married in the 90s. I was lucky because, a generation before, my mom was not even asked about the willingness to marry or not. The parents opted for everything. I am fortunate to belong to the generation where I was asked my will. Parents proceeded only after my consent. But when we were tied in a relationship, we gave our best to make it work well. Every relationship needs dedication, love, patience, loyalty, and commitment. We are all human, and we have distinctive characteristics. We cannot be the same. Some have a lot of patience; some have quick anger, some get anxious soon, and so on. But that is what human emotion all about. If we all were the same, would we not be robots? Tolerating each other when in love is the real essence of love. If self-esteem, reverence, and condescension are brought between love, it ruins it. We were taught that we should give our best to be attached to our partners no matter what. In anger, everybody speaks foul, but that should not be the reason to spoil the tie. If there are hundreds of reasons to break up, only one firm and robust reason to tie should be passion and admiration. Because of these morals, most of us are having a positive and steadfast relationship. We made stone and brick houses our homes and decorated them with our values.

But I fail to understand today's generation. I have seen them fear the commitments and are petrified to be tied up. What is the liberty to them, I fail to understand? Being alone and into numerous affairs is what they call freedom. They feel marriage is to have someone always nagging after them. If they commit even, it is so easy for them to break up the relationship. It is as if love never existed between them. Since they are financially independent, breaking a tie is like eating a piece of cake. But does money play the role of a human being? Does it accompany you when you are lonely? Does it try to lift your spirit? No. we need real people to live a life. We need a partner to share all our happiness and sorrow. So my dear friends, never be afraid of commitments. It is a real joy to live a happy married life. It is not nagging; it is care and concern. To hold the hand of a partner and walk the long path of life is bliss. Never bring the pride of being educated, or financially independent, or self-pride and ego in between. Letting go of small and insignificant things is always healthy. If you are not abused and belittled, it is always good to bend a little and let things pass. Parents should also give kids little space to flourish. They should not be supporting them for everything. They should teach kids that every relationship needs time and patience. Not to hurry in deciding by seeing only from their perspective. To understand the fault, we need to see from the partner's point of view even. Let not a few failures and unhealthy relationships mold your minds towards negativity. We should be the explorers of our life. We need not decide what to do seeing other's discoveries. Everybody has their equations to lead life. Create your equation and formulas to make every relationship successful. Above all, do not be afraid of responsibilities to carry. It is what distinguishes us from other animals. We are capable of accepting tasks, and it gives a new direction to life.

Moreover, it needs brave hearts to be in a relationship rather than afraid cocks. So friends, always be committed and bravely step into this beautiful and thrilling roller coaster of life. It is worth taking a chance.

         …………NOOR TABASSUM………...